On Monday I had an inspiring conversation with Joey Phillipi whose mission is to build women’s confidence through creating community. Part of her vision is based on the premise that we become whom we surround ourselves with. Think child who never chases her dreams because of her conservative family. Or young adult who limits her goals because all her friends are settling (in career, love life, etc.) Misery loves company. But so does confidence. If you really want to be more confident in your life, it is essential that you 1. limit your time with people who lack self-confidence and 2. find people who build you up. If the first step is not realistic - for example, a negative family member always shoots down your ideas - have the smarts to at least not tell them your delicate hopes and dreams. On point #2, go find your tribe. True confidence cannot exist in a vacuum and, in order for it to grow and flourish, you also need community to support you in all of your possibility.
Before talking to Joey, I already knew it was important to build my circle. But I think I underestimated its unique power. Self-confidence is a personal journey for sure. But it might be equally important to share passions and goals with others and receive the encouragement to keep going. I'm already experiencing this shift every day as I reach out to other people in my field. As a result, I think my approach to helping women and girls grow their confidence is starting to change too. I’ve focused on one-on-one coaching in the past. Now, I'm realizing that the relationships people build with like-minded others through group or partnership work can make the personal quest for confidence even more possible, sustainable and successful.